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Sandra Rose: Hip-Hop’s Ugliest Blogger!

Sandra Rose: Hip-Hop’s Ugliest Blogger!

By Khalil Amani


In no way do I claim to be the most handsomest man walking the face of God’s green earth, but when I look at my hip-hop blogging counterparts—Sandra Rose (of Sandrarose.com) and Byron Crawford (of Byroncrawford.com & XXLmag.com), I’m Denzel-esque!


(Blogger Sandra Rose, hip-hop's ugliest blogger)


I’m not that vain and superficial that I would call somebody ugly just because…


But these Negroes—they get the “Hip-Hop Ugly Blogger Award!” Not because Sandra Rose is dark-skint, but rather because she is skint tore-up-from-the-floor-up! Not because Byron Crawford is a Pillsbury Dough Boy (some of the best poontang I’ve ever had was from fat plus-size women), but because he is a sloppy introverted Internet assassin. They get the “Hip-Hop Ugly Blogger Award” because they have the ugliest personas—always looking to diss someone for an Internet hit.


(The Real Byron Crawford aka Bol and his high-school picture in upper right corner)


Bing Crosby used to sing, “You must’ve been a beautiful baby; you must’ve been a beautiful child!” But cot-damn! Look at you now! In the words of the Color Purple’s Celie, “You sho’ is uglay!”


If you’re the kind of person that enjoys seeing famous people fall from grace and have their name run through the mud—if you revel in the woes of celebrities—if it makes your day to hear of a star’s lost love, criminal behavior or adulterous lifestyle—these are the sites for you! Wildly popular amongst talentless people whose dreams have been crushed by the everyday grind of life no-life-having-haters, these sites receive beaucoup hits and have tons of dick-riders fans.


Sandra Rose tops Byron Crawford in hateration because her blogs are just gratuitous assumptions based on rumor and grapevine scuttlebutt. Byron Crawford, on the other hand, makes blogging clever by pointing out the oh-so-obvious.


Word on the streets is that Sandra Rose is a lesbian. Word on the streets is that she’s a nurse! She has a Clark Kent/Superman persona. By day she’s a caring, loving nurse who helps the sick, injured and ailing. By night, she trades in her scrubs and cloaks herself in hater garments and becomes a venomous asp—dishing dirt on your favorite celebrity for shits & giggles.


Sandra Rose, aesthetically-challenged as she is, has every right to be a hater. Just look at this “DSLB” (Dark Skint Lesbian Bish). She looks like she was beat with an ugly stick as a child! She looks like she got into a chain fight and forgot to bring her chain! She looks like Celie’s daughter. She looks like the ugly girl that went to the prom with other ugly girls. She has a face that only a mother could love. This heifer has scars all across her forehead like she’s into flagellation or some perverted sex ritual with one of her lesbun girlfriends.

(The flagellated/scarred blogger Sandra Rose)


Most definitely a “two-bagger.” (One bag over her face during sex and one bag over my face, in case her bag tears.) I can totally understand her bitterness at all things beautiful and celebratory.


Not being limited by her ugliness, Sandra Rose has taken her ugly exterior and branded it with her ugly interior and has found her niche in life—to be one of hip-hop’s greatest, most popular bloggers—shitting on people like Bow Wow, Chris Brown, Jermaine Dupree and Beyonce’. She has their ears!


There was a time when an ugly person’s opinion didn’t count. (Thanks Internet!)


Sandra Rose (what a pretty name!) and Byron Crawford are hands down hip-hop’s most ugly duo of bloggers—not just their aesthetics, but how they approach the rap genre is ugly, bitter, mean-spirited and down-right hateful. These two coons are the biggest haters critics of all things hip-hop.


Those of you who follow Bryon Crawford aka Bol know that he’s blogged about my ass ad nauseam! First there was “The Third Best Blog Evar!” Then came “Khalil Amani is an AIDS-Ridden D/L Brother.” That blog was supposed to be the cu de grace (death blow) to my blogging “career.” BC continued his rants against me with “Bol and Khalil Amani in the New Spin (nullus!),” “Still Closeted After All These Years,” “Guess Who’s on the Cover of Straight Stuntin?” and “Khalil Amani Ethered by 40 Glocc on Twitter” to name a few.


But I’ve got a soft-spot in my heart for fat-so (pause). I like the way he writes!


Sandra Rose—she comes off bitter, contrived, and seems to use her blog as payback for not being admitted to Atlanta’s chic-est hotspots. Something terrible happened in her past. Tell us Auntie Sandra—what’s really the source of your hateration?

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Comment by mister on September 14, 2010 at 8:24am
LOL

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