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The Hater: Tearing Young Jack Thriller a New Sphincter!

The Hater: Tearing Young Jack Thriller a New Sphincter!

By Khalil Amani


50 Cent got hella jokes! (Think Pimpin’ Curly). His latest joke could be the “coup de grace” (death blow) to the career of one of his employees—Comedian Young Jack Thriller, the prosthetic-eyed funny man on G-Unit’s roster of talent. Unless you’ve been under a hip-hop rock, you know who Young Jack Thriller is. He’s a regular on where you can catch him interviewing some of our favorite rappers. He has a way of disarming them and turning their ice-grill countenances to smiles and laughter.

(G-Unit comedian Young Jack Thriller)


Most recently, the G-Unit head-honcho (Fiddy) posted a video of some masked guy going ham on Young Jack Thriller! (It might be DJ Whoo Kid?) Granted, this could be a joke knowing 50 Cent. He is not afraid to poke fun at himself, let alone his staff. But for shits & giggles, let’s assume this is an authentic video of a Young Jack Thriller hater criticizer.


Apparently, this masked man is fed up with seeing Young Jack Thriller’s face and wonders out loud how he was able to manipulate his way into the G-Unit camp. Call it a tirade, a soliloquy or an Ebonic rant—Home-Skillet went in with a 2:37 minute video on Young Jack Thriller’s appearance, inflecting a “No Homo” to let us know he’s not leering at him in a sexually suggestive way. He wants to see Lloyd Banks or DJ Whoo Kid or some phat-booty bitches doing the interviews—anybody but this dude Young Jack Thriller! Listen to him:


“Big-bootleg-Mr.-Clean-looking-ass-nigga-big-oned-eyed-Willy-muthafucka-big-fake-ass-Tiny-Lister-ass-SK-hat-wearin’-nigga-broke-ass-Biggie-Smalls-fake-ass-broke-ass-George-Forman-lookin’- fake-ass-Charles-Barkley-ass-nigga-Fresh-Prince-lookin’ like a muthafucka jigga boo-Who is this nigga?-How did he get up into Thisis50 office to be doin’ these interviews? And like, why this nigga gotta be all up in the cameras? Big-Tigger-Ninja-Turtle-lookin’-ass-fake-ass-little-kumbayah-Lord-Of-The-Rings-lookin-ass-Louis-Gossett-Sammy-Davis-Jr.-Idaho-Potatoe-lookin’-ass-flappy-ass-fake-ass-trap-house-runnin’-lookin’-ass-big-Kunte-Kinte-plantation-ass-Poppa-Smurf-G.I. Joe… y’all need to fire his ass! …Tight-ass-jean-with-a-Justin-Bieber-shirt.”

Click here for the complete video coonery.


Admittedly, this was some funny shit! I would’ve thrown in a “Chit’lin head” for good measure. (YJT reminds me of an old fraternity buddy by that name.)


My, my my! Talk about “hate.” This guy should be the poster-boy for “hate.” Like an Internet thug—a keyboard gangsta—dude put on his ghetto Phantom of the Opera mask and went ape-shit on YJT! I still think it’s a G-Unit prank, but I’m hoping it was real, because dude really strung some words together. I’ll give the hater an “A” for hateration and an “F” for deconstruction. Not once did the hater say YJT wasn’t funny. His whole polemic argument was based on YJT’s appearance! It was all about aesthetics! It was all about looks! Again, not once, did he critique YJT comedic timing or his interviewing style. And then he wants to say “No homo?” GTFOH! You’re not gay, yet you make a video about another man’s looks? Even a one-eyed comedian can see through that!

(The face of hateration)


We ain’t got out of the first month of 2012 and HATE is still part of our make-up! Didn’t dude get the memo that 2012 could be humanity’s last stand? (Thus saith the Mayans and other prognosticators.)


Why is this jack-ass looking at YJT’s aesthetics? Again, you say, “No homo,” but that’s still gay to comment on another man’s appearance! I mean, like, what’s a comic supposed to look like? If you wanna see some chicks with phat-asses get you a Straight Stuntin Magazine (Did I mention that I write for this magazine? Shameless plug) If you need visual stimulation, these Internets have all the “pr0n” you want. For your rant, you get 15 seconds of fame—and then it’s back to flipping burgers while Young Jack Thriller—with that one good eye—eye fucks your girl in the club. If you taste something tart on her lips…


To the HATER—it’s all about finding one’s Raison d'être (Reason for existence, pronounced ray-zon -detra) Find yours before you breed the next generation of haters—a lil bad-ass bebe kid hater.


Young Jack Thriller is funny! The whole one-eye “Do I have something in my eye?” shtick is always funny and disarming to the interviewees. Young Jack Thriller is shaping up to be this generation’s ghetto Rodney Dangerfield with his self-deprecating style of comedic relief. Give the guy a break! And vote to keep him on Fiddy! We appreciate you letting haters voice their “opinions,” but, in this case, it is truly “Opinions are like assholes. Everybody has one!” Send this hater to The-Land-of-Not-Quite-Ready-for-Prime-Time—that great ghetto abyss.


Khalil Amani writes for DJ Kayslay's Straight Stuntin Magazine. The most controversial hip-hop blogger. Gay hip-hop's straight spiritual advisor. Follow on Facebook, Twitter, Myspace @ khalil amani

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